Allyuh…Valentine’s Day without a plus one can feel awkward sometimes. The 14th of February forces many to focus on those they love and cherish affectionately but it also incites a lot of emotions for singles who are feeling that sense of emptiness.
Understanding that singleness is not an issue that needs to be fixed nor is it a consequence. Singleness can be the best season in one’s life. As, life is full of swift transitions, cause 2022 might look completely different.
With that said, this year, we asked the IzzSo Community of beautiful people to tell us how they will be celebrating this day of love this year. From virtual speed dating to day trips, these women are proof that Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be sour like ‘Caraili’.
Maajida, 40 – Why She Chooses to be Single: “I’m rediscovering myself and spending time to figure out what I want.”
Her Plans for Valentine’s Day: “I’m attending a Galentine’s Day Event where I am surrounding myself with other women and focusing on building mutually beneficial relationships while promoting self-care.”
Sasha, 29 – Why She Chooses to be Single: “The men I come across are very selfish, oh gosh…And never want to prioritize me but want me to prioritize them. I am no one’s mother and I am a girl boss, I can’t make time if I’m not going to get it back. I refuse.”
Her Plans for Valentine’s Day: “My friend and I are planning to go out and have brunch and partake in the ‘Galentine’s’ theme. We are both very single so very excited to lean on my good sis.
Roger, 34 – Why He Chooses to be Single: “I heard this once and it stuck with me ever since my last relationship 2 years ago: figure out why you’re important and never settle for anyone who doesn’t completely agree. I’m incredible alone and I’ve taken the necessary steps to know and understand my self-worth as a human being, as a man.”
“The things I tolerated in the past are no longer factors in my life. I feel like being alone has shaped the formation of my self-confidence and now I can experience great love when the time is right and I find the woman of my life.”
His Plans for Valentine’s Day: “As an advocate for self wellness, I plan on jumping in my car, eating ah good food and taking myself on a solo trip to wherever my heart desires. I’m thinking maybe the beach, a hike or rent a hotel room because simply I deserve it!”
Indra, 45 – Why She Chooses to be Single: “My last relationship ended because we were speaking different love languages and showing love differently. Communication became a major deficit in our relationship and led to us ultimately calling it quits. I’ve been attempting to work at this intentional dating thing but haven’t been extremely successful in it – but I’m honestly unsure if I’m actually ready. Healing from betrayal trauma in past relationships has been a process – but I’m actively working to process and recover from it.”
Her Plans for Valentine’s Day: “One of my sister-friends and are going out to eat dinner and of course sticking to my tradition of exchanging gifts with my mummy and sister.”
Vanessa, 30 – Why She Chooses to be Single: “I took some time to really understand myself in my 20s while pursuing my dream career and life. Now that I am 30, I am ready to dive in, now that I know more of what I am looking for. The things I wanted in my early 20s are very different than what I want now.”
Her Plans for Valentine’s Day: “Relaxing! I plan to take the time off work and hit a full SPA DAY for just me, manicure, pedi, body massage, facial, the works!”
Here are a few tips she suggests for singles to stay emotionally grounded during V-Day:
- If you feel that getting on social media might cause a bit of anxiety, set healthy boundaries or avoid it altogether. It is OK to guard your heart and protect your mental health.
- Set aside intentional time to be grateful for the love that is in your life currently. Romantic love isn’t the only love that can be celebrated on V-Day. Take a moment to show gratitude for all the people in your world that make you feel special and appreciated.
- Despite the pressure you may feel from society, know that you are in the right place. V-Day can cause you to feel like you are detached from the rest of society. In turn, you internalize your singleness making you ask yourself, “Why am I still single?”
Valentine’s Day can be a wonderful time if you are in a relationship, but difficult if you find yourself alone. If you’re struggling with severe feelings of loneliness, it might be a good idea to reach out to a therapist. They can also help you develop some healthy coping mechanisms.
If you are spending this holiday alone, try to remind yourself of how wonderful you are and show yourself some compassion and love on Valentine’s Day.